Starting the morning
by Xenmas321
Summary: Ichigo, Chad, Rukai, and Orihime stay in a expensive hotel without Uryuu, he did not want to go. Now, This is really random so beware. Have fun reading! :P
1. Chapter 1

STARTING THE MORNING

PART 1: NIGHTMARE

I am tired of making it in regular, proper English so I am going to write it like a play, get over it

* * *

(In Tokyo, Ichigo is on vacation from soul reaping. He brought Rukia, Orihime, and Chad with him. Uryuu wanted to be an ass and didn't want to go. So, they now stay in a hotel. A very expensive one, but Rukia somehow had enough money. And now, we start our story.) 

Ichigo: -Lies in his bed, snoring up a storm- ZzzzZzzzZzzz…

Chad: -Is also sleeping, in the same room of Ichigo, somehow…-

Rukia: -Is in the other room, sleeping quietly-

Orihime: -Is tossing turning- Nnngh… Mnnn… -sits straight up suddenly, gripping the blanket- EVIL FRIED CHICKENS WITH LAZERS!!!!

Rukia: -Falls out of bed from the sudden outburst- GAHH!!!

Orihime: -Pant pant- Uhh… Rukia-chan... Why are you on the floor?

Rukia: -is twitching on floor, landed on her face- Mufff….

Orihime: Wha-what?

Rukia: -gets up slowly, her face red from the fall- I said, "You had a nightmare and scared me…"

Orihime: Oh? Sorry Rukia-chan! -She grips the blanket and bows apologetically-

Rukia: It's ok; it happens… -nose bleeds-

Orihime: Umm… Rukia-chan… Your nose is bleeding…

Rukia: It is…? Damn! Where are the tissues!!! No! It's staining my pajamas!! –Runs around franticly looking for tissues-

Orihime: -Is holding a box of tissues- Here, Rukia-chan!

Rukia: -snatches it and stuffs some tissues in her nose- Ah... Good… Now, what was the nightmare about?

Orihime: Umm... It was about Ichigo and you fighting a giant hollow.

Rukia: Ok, and?

Orihime: And your guys were kicking butt! But…

Rukia But?

Orihime: Aizen kidnaps me and I go to some weird desert with some weird Spanish name!

Rukia: That's all?

Orihime: No! There were many weird people! There was this Italian man who wanted my number! And a weird guy named Grimmjow who wanted to look up my skirt! And...And... –Shivers- There was this weird emo guy with weird green eyes whose name was too long too say…

Rukia: -blinks- Umm… Then why did you yell something about fried evil chickens..?

Orihime: Umm… I don't remember…

Rukia: -falls to the floor again-

Orihime: Rukia-chan! You need to learn how to stand! –Tries to help her-

* * *

End

Next: Part 2: The weird moments


	2. Chapter 2

Starting the morning

Part 2: Weird moments

This one is about Ichigo and Chad now, I hope it works.

(In Ichigo and Chad's room, something lurks)

-skitter skitter-

Ichigo: -continues to sleep, snoring like a chainsaw-

-A sudden flash of yellow disappears under Ichigo's sheets-

Ichigo: -He rolls over and accidental kicks the thing under the sheets-

Anonymous: -squeaks loudly- Ow!

Ichigo: -yawns and drags his feet up, dragging the squeaking thing with it-

Anonymous: Gahhh!

Ichigo: -He rolls back on his back –

Chad: -wakes up from the squeaking- Hm?

Anonymous: -Stays still, with a sweat drop on his forehead-

Chad: -Looks at Ichigo and he has a weird bulge protruding from between his legs. He thinks, _"God… Ichigo must be having some hell of a dream..."- _Yo, Ichigo.

Ichigo: -Stirs- Yeah, Chad?

Chad: -points to Ichigo's bulge- What were you dreaming about?

Ichigo: -Looks down and grabs the bulge- Not mine. But it squeaks…

Anonymous: GAHH!!!

Ichigo: Why are you between my legs, Kon?

Kon: I wanted to ask you where Rukia-san's room was! But then you trapped me between your legs! -Struggles-

Ichigo: -vein throbs on his forehead- And why are you here…?

Kon: -Sweat drop- Umm… Because I wanted to… Be there when there are hollows! Yeah, that's it!

Chad: I thought you were at home with Yuzu.

Kon: -Shivers- Being there... With her… It's like being in guy hell… -remembers all of the evil girly things that Yuzu and her sister do to him-

Ichigo: -picks up Kon by his head and throws him hard into the wall- Doesn't mean you can come with us!

Kon: -squeaks when he hits the wall- AGH! –Falls down onto the hard floor-

Chad: -gets up and holds up Kon by his leg- What should we do to him?

Ichigo: I got an idea.

(They begin to undo the strings Kon and one of the limbs fall onto the floor. A few minutes later, Orihime and Rukia opens Ichigo's and Chad's room door)

Rukia: Hey, you guys read-

(They find Chad blocking their view, Ichigo kneeling in front of him, his face between his legs)

Rukia: OH MY GOD!!! ORIHIME!! COVER YOU'RE EYES!!! –Tries to cover Orihime's eyes.-

Orihime: OH MY GOD!!! ICHIGO IS GAY!!! –Runs out of the room-

Ichigo: -looks around Chad- WH-WHAT!? I'M NOT GAY!!!

Chad: -turns around- What are they talking about?

Rukia: TOO LATE!! I'M TELLING EVERYONE!!! –Runs out of the room, getting her cell phone out-

Ichigo: -Gets up and runs after her- GET BACK HERE!!!!


	3. Chapter 3

Starting the morning

Part 3: Breakfast

(Everybody went to the lobby to get some breakfast since they got tired of room service. Rukia treated everybody to breakfast. Where does she get all of her money? Here is our story)

* * *

Ichigo: Rukia, where did you get all this money? 

Rukia: What do you mean?

Ichigo: I mean... You just have all this money suddenly. Where did you get it?

Rukia: I hacked into your bank account and used all of your money to pay for it. You're in debt.

Ichigo: WHAT!!!??!

Rukia: Haha, just kidding Ichigo!

Ichigo: -runs off to an ATM machine to make sure-

Orihime: Rukia-chan, where did you get the money?

Rukia: Well, I-

Waitress: -comes by with few huge plates of food in each arm- Here is your stack of pancakes, with whip cream and a strawberry on top. And here is you bacon and eggs, extra bacon and eggs. And omelets with ketchup and… -holds a single plate- Pancakes with pickles, whip cream, ketchup, sprinkles and blueberry sauce on top…

Orihime: That's me!

Waitress: -hands out the plate- Have a good breakfast! –in head, "_Who the fuck eats pancakes with that weird junk on it..?"_-

Ichigo: -comes back after the money panic- Ok, you were telling the truth.

Rukia: Don't I always?

Ichigo: Not when you blamed Kon for leaving a tampon on my toilet seat…

Rukia: -blushes and slaps the table- KON WANTED TO BE A PERVERT AND STOLE IT, OK!?!?!

-Everybody around them stops eating and stares at them-

Rukia: -sweat drop- Umm… Sorry! Don't mind us! We are just a bit hungry! –Laughs nervously and give Ichigo the glare-

-Orihime and Chad chuckles to themselves-

Rukia: -was about to shout again but instead she kicks everyone under the table-

Orihime: Ow!

Chad: -hardly feels it- Hm?

Ichigo: Ah! -Holds shin since she kicked him the hardest-

Rukia: What? Is someone kicking someone? –She laughs innocently even though she is guilty-

Ichigo: Why you…

Orihime: Rukia-chan, where did you get the money?

Rukia: -slips some of her drink and clears her throat- I go around and sleep with the highest paid man in soul society and get 2/5 of their money.

-PAUSE-

Rukia: -laughs- Oh c'mon guys! I was joking!

Ichigo: …How do we know for sure…?

Rukia: You think I sleep around with some old geezer..?

Ichigo: It's possible…

Orihime: Umm... What is the REAL reason Rukia..?

Rukia: I get paid by Soul society and use a false bank account. Every shinigami has one incase they are in the real world and need to get something.

Chad: So, you basically get everything for free…

Rukia: No! We just give them IOU's.

Ichigo: That's basically what Chad said.

Rukia: -pours strawberry syrup on Ichigo's head- What was that, Strawberry?

Ichigo: I am not a freakin' Strawberry!

Rukia: Your name means strawberry, so now you are called strawberry. –pulls out a Strawberry costume out of nowhere and puts it on Ichigo- WEAR IT!!!

Ichigo: GAH!!! –He struggles and tries to escape.-

-Rukia successfully got the costume onto Ichigo. But, the bad thing is, it's stuck. So, Ichigo had to go almost 2 hours in public, looking like the strawberry he is.-

Ichigo: If there is a god, he hates me…

Orihime: No, Rukia hates you.

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

Starting the morning

Starting the morning

Part 4: 

In this chapter, Kenpachi somehow gets into the story. Let's just hope Strawberry…Ichigo can stay alive. Have fun reading. 

-The group is going inside as they hide Ichigo in his strawberry costume, stuck on him. Orihime was in the bathroom during the whole time Ichigo was a strawberry.-

Ichigo: Rukia, I'm so going to kill you….

Rukia: It's not my fault your zipper doesn't work.

Ichigo: You are the one who forced it on me!

Rukia: Shut up, you fruit.

Orihime: -She walks out and finds Rukia and Chad. - Hey guys! What are you… -spots the giant strawberry- Gahhh!! -She pulls out two sporks and tackles Ichigo in his Strawberry costume- YOU'RE MINE!!

Ichigo: GAAAHH!! ORIHIME!! IT'S ME!! ICHIGO!! –He is now struggling hard while he avoids the Spork stabbings-

Orihime: I KNOW YOU ARE!! COME HERE STRAWBERRY!! – Stabs quickly like a homicidal maniac on crack. – 

Ichigo: AHHH!! RUKIA!! DO SOMETHING!! –He screams and squirms furiously, trying escape from the plastic stabbings of his back. –

Rukia: Are you kidding? This is entertaining. –She sits back on a bench nearby and Chad joins her, watching the Spork stabbings. –

-Out of nowhere, a huge figure walks by and picks up Orihime.-

Orihime: Eh!? –Squirms in mid-air.-

Rukia: It can't be…!

Ichigo: -Looks up and his face goes pale- It's….

Kenpachi: Oi, why are you trying to kill Ichigo, woman? –He is holding Orihime by her belt with one finger-

Orihime: But…I want teh strawberry… -Sniffles-

Ichigo: -Looks up at her and bonks her on the head, leaving a bump on her head. – YOU DUMBASS!!

Orihime: AHH!! 

Rukia: -Kicks Ichigo's stomach- YOU DON'T HIT GIRLS!!

Chad: -Punches Ichigo's face-

Ichigo: -Recoils and holds his bloody nose- WHAT WAS THAT FOR CHAD!?

Chad: I forget…

Kenpachi: -Has the blank look on his face, staring at the four. - ….Freaks…

Ichigo: -He looks up at Kenpachi and points at him- FREAK!? YOU'RE THE FREAK HERE!

Kenpachi: Do you see me in a fruit costume, Fruit?

Ichigo: -Has a huge vein on his forehead, pulsating. - It was Rukia's doing…

Kenpachi: What? Were you guys role playing out your sexual fantasies and you got stuck?

Rukia and Ichigo: WHAT!?

Rukia: I CAN'T BE WITH HIM!! HE'S GAY!! (Look in the 2nd chapter)

Ichigo: AM NOT!!

Kenpachi: -He sighs- I'm surprised that you guys didn't break your heads yet from all of the shouting… -He puts down Orihime- Now Ichigo, let's fight.

Ichigo: Wha!? Why!?

Kenpachi: Because it's fun.

Ichigo: Don't you have any other talents?

Kenpachi: Hmm… -He remembers way back when he was a lil lad. He remembers when he was in the carnivals and won every knitting contest in Soul Society- …No.

Ichigo: Why not knitting?

Kenpachi: Wha!? What are you..!

Ichigo: I saw it in your flash back.

Rukia: Damn… Wait till all the captains hear this!

Kenpachi: Do it Rukia, I'll tell your brother about your "bunny."

Rukia: Uuh… What are you talking about? I wasn't going to tell anyone! Yup! No one!

Kenpachi: Ok, now. Ichigo! Let's fight!

Ichigo: I can't in this…

Kenpachi: Too bad! –He goes into his shinigami form and slashes at Ichigo-

Ichigo: -Avoids slightly but it cuts the costume instead- YES! I'M FREE!!

Rukia: Damn!

Ichigo: Now, let's end this!

-Ichigo and Kenpachi go all out over Tokyo, everyone either getting killed from the missed shots of high powered spirit attacks or completely obliterated from existence-

Well, I hope you liked it. I didn't put much effort into it but yeah. See you laterz!


End file.
